Becoming a butterfly 🦋

Finding strength from within is hard to do but ever so rewarding. This week has been very challenging; trying to change my mindset around referring to it being a struggle because here I am surviving it! Every evening I've had to rest a lot so whilst I have no plans for the weekend I will try to continue that theme without caving to the need to be doing something at every second.

It's also hard when others listen and share caring ideas to realise just because something works for them if your gut is saying this isn't true for me to know that you don't have to follow the same path. Trust your instincts and the universe/God/higher self (or whatever you choose to believe in), everything happens for a reason.

Whilst I've been feeling vulnerable the news has been affecting me more than usual, from the Grenfell Tower documentary and court updates to the shootings in Christchurch, New Zealand. I feel saddened by the events and the failures that could have saved some lives. It's made me face up to my prejudice towards people that I hadn't been fully aware of but also given me more perspective on seeing things from different points of view. Whilst I can't change what has happened I allow myself to feel empathy for the loss but not allowing it to steal the potential happiness from living in the present moment. So I've gently had to keep bringing myself back to focusing on me (whilst feeling selfish at times).

These butterfly fairy lights have shone brightly due the amount of sunshine we've had despite it being the cool temperatures outside. They've felt like spiritual healing as I've laid in bed just looking up at them overhead. A glow that seeps into my skin as if to restore my energy from the day's events and prepare me for what the next day has in store.

I have a huge love of butterflies and love spotting them flutter around in nature, so when my mum says "go fly my little butterfly" it fills me with a feeling I can't describe. Joy, sense of calm, beauty, hope, abundance are some of the words that come to mind but really it's so much more.